If you’re having trouble with writer’s block, or anything similar, I’ve got a few things to try to create the spark necessary to light the fire of creativity.

I spy with my little eye…

Look around you. Everything is created out of some necessity or urge. Everything has a purpose. Televisions were created to provide entertainment in every household. Pianos were created to make pretty noises. Trash cans are collectors or holders of all things unwanted. Computers make it easier to produce, store, and transmit information.

Now think about your purpose. Find an urge which has not yet been fulfilled.

Talk to yourself

When I say talk to yourself, I don’t mean tell yourself what to do. Don’t say, “You should get back to work.” That won’t help. Rather, have a conversation. Ask questions. Every blog post I’ve ever written, and every word in every blog post, has come from a question.

Ask yourself, “What do I know? What can I share?” And when you’ve started writing, “What words will convey the meaning I want?”

Talent borrows

Read something that somebody else has produced. Read your favorite poem, or chapter, or quote. Find something that strikes a chord. Now emulate that. Think about how you feel reading it. Analyze it. Think about the genius, the emotion, that has created this work.

But Genius steals

Steal something. No, I don’t mean plagiarize. Take somebody else’s idea and turn it into your own. Improve upon it. Or argue with it. Critique it. Tear it to shreds. It doesn’t matter what you end up doing with it. Chances are, if you look at something somebody else (or even a younger you) produced, you’ll spot a major flaw, and you can easily advance it toward perfection.

Experiment

Bloggers and columnists share one trouble: the niche. In order to be successful, you must be narrow. Then, when you get readers, they will further push you into whatever space they need filled. You start as a jack-of-all-trades, producing your own fictional stories and motivational speeches, providing relationship advice, and making over rooms on your spare time. When you realize this is going nowhere, you choose to label yourself a psychology blogger. And then your readers turn to you for your relationship advice and only your relationship advice.

So to find inspiration, try something different. Write a pop song about how happy you are, rather than another politically-heated folk song. Discuss the pros of gay marriage if you’re against it. Focus on a Roman god instead of a Greek one. Just do something different. If you’re stuck on one topic, free yourself on another.

The most important thing to remember when trying to find inspiration is that it is intangible. There are no absolutes. There is nothing concrete to grab or chase. It comes and goes, and it always helps to be prepared for a time when you won’t be inspired. Unfortunately, it’s a fact of life, and will never change.

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Don’t write any “Well, he loves Oprah, so he’s biased”-style comments, please. I’m totally going to be a professional about this.

In fact, I’m going to open with this: Yes. Yes, they are (Maybe a lie, maybe not. We’ll find out later I suppose).

Twitter started a few years back with the intent of keeping friends updated with what other friends are doing at that very moment. Through its many mobile capabilities, it succeeded with its goal, albeit in a rather poorly executed manner (let’s face it: their idea of coding is definitely not scalable). So you had friends talking with each other on a site rather than via instant messenger, which had been around a lot longer and was a lot easier to use.

But rather than make this a talk about how there was no point to Twitter’s very existence, let’s look at what happened next:

The marketers stepped in.

Slowly, the flood gates opened, and spammers from all across the world joined Twitter, followed you, and when you followed them back, they spammed you. All of you. A lot. So you de-followed them. And it was good.

And then the articles came.

Yes, you remember those: they’re still being posted by the late starters who are just now getting it that Twitter is a great resource for branding and marketing. They’re putting up how-to guides and conveniently add in their spam-tastic profiles complete with auto-responders at the end.

And then the television stations joined.

They were losing viewers and needed a new way to market themselves, so they set up Twitter profiles to make people feel like they’re ahead of the curve.

And now, here come the celebrities.

What better way to prevent from dropping out of the public eye all while continuing your social whoring than Twitter? It’s 140 characters of thoughtless text. There is no way to develop a story in so many words. There is no personality. There is no pressure!

So the celebrities came, and now you think they’re destroying Twitter.

Hah! Hardly. They’re just so much easier to blame! They have faces you can see every day if you’d like, yet you’ve never had any personal interaction with them, so you don’t actually know them.

You want to know who ruined Twitter?

Television stations. They ruined it! They posted every story, abusing their audience, and bringing no real value that can’t be gained from watching a simple newscast.

I’m kidding. It was the bloggers!

Yes, those bloggers who claim to be “Social Media experts/gurus/mavens/etc.” They ruined Twitter by giving those marketers the guidelines and reasons to spam everybody. You made this happen, because you had to pretend to know something by writing this tripe.

I’m kidding, of course. It was the spammers.

Hah! They’re easy to blame, right? Nobody likes spam. Everybody gets it. It touches a special place in our hearts after hearing about stories such as an old lady getting tricked into sending money to Nigeria.

But no. Who ruined Twitter?

The original users. That’s right. Take it back to the good ol’ days. Or, you know, 2006. Whatever. What did Twitter look like?

Nothing. There were no power users. Everybody knew everybody. It was like a small town, operating in its still-pristine state. No spammers. No celebrities. Just friends keeping up with friends.

Then y’all got greedy. You had to share it with the world in order to gain recognition as an early adopter. You had to write how-to guides.

And when the spammers came in, besides piss and moan, what did you do?

Nothing. In fact, you wrote more guides on how to use it as a marketing tool.

So, no. Don’t you dare blame celebrities for Twitter’s unfortunate state. I mean, Ashton Kutcher can be blamed for plenty of things, and you can throw things at him all you want. I don’t care. But don’t say that he, or Oprah, or Shaq are the reason for all this. Look at yourself. If you hadn’t sat idly by while the site was abused for three years, then maybe it would have turned out differently. But you’ve got no right to blame anybody other than yourselves.

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Sometime around now last year, I started my first actually-displays-in-Google-results and gets-readers-style blog. I think it may have been a bit before, like March, when I signed up for AdSense, but it was close.

That said, I randomly checked out my account today. Naturally, I saw a line of zeroes, so, as always, I selected “All time” from the dropdown box.

$6.84.

Huh. I wonder why it went up.

Maybe Google just has sympathy for me.

That means I make about 13 cents a week from AdSense.

Hm, at that rate, I can pay for one of my five domain names in just a few more months.

Thus, I present to you the steps you can take in order to make $0.13 per week with AdSense:

Paste it onto non-targeted sites

Whether it be poor keyword selection, covering a wide variety of unrelated niches, or simply running it on a site whose audience doesn’t even view ads (e.g. Tech blogs which run articles about Adblock Plus), this is an important step to preventing bringing in the big bucks with AdSense.

Don’t optimize your positioning

To get the most bang for your buck, so to speak, put a well-blended 125×125 in your sidebar, below the fold, and past any content regular visitors will see, preferably surrounded by content nobody will read (a blog roll, for example). Don’t read about the heat map, don’t try different positions, and definitely don’t do any research.

Don’t get any traffic

Stumbling your own articles and putting them into irrelevant categories is a great way to kill any targeting you once had. Additionally, participate in social networks nobody uses, be very overbearing in your approach to drive away any potential interest, and always be sure to follow the three Bs: beg, bitch, and be beligerent.

Drive away any traffic you do get

• Include a welcome message for stumblers asking for a thumbs up (remember the three Bs)
• Fill your blog only with spam and pictures of your ugly puppy
• Have an eye-disintegrating design
• Provide no access to RSS/email subscriptions (you know, just to prevent any repeat visitors)
• Insult any commentors (or don’t follow up at all)
• Steal content from other sites with no attribution
• Host your blog on a free service (preferably Blogger) or free hosting complete with banner ads
• Provide no real useful information

Last but not least…

Take absolutely no advice whatsoever (not even your own!) related to making more money online.

Follow this post like The Bible (Or, you know, the Kama Sutra) and I guarantee you will make as little money online as is humanly possible while still running ads.

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It’s not supposed to be this way: a professional, budding, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed young man being completely paralyzed by fear of rejection. Especially not somebody who so frequently talks about marketing and networking. But we all have our little secrets, hypocrisies, idiosyncrasies… Whatever you’d like to call them.

Thus, I write today not a how-to article on networking. Clearly, I’m bad at that. Rather, I present the “why” behind networking. The reason to get yourself and your business out there.

Have some whiskey, honey. Makes you feel better!

You see, we, as people, are urged by instinct to find a “place” (group) to belong. We become sick when we live in a life of anomie, which many sociologists use to explain the higher suicide rates in larger, anonymous towns than in small ones where everybody knows everybody.

It’s healthy, and at times downright mandatory, to put oneself on the forefront, meeting new people and making friends and comrades. Without doing so, many people go insane (there is truth in the cliche mad hermit in every wilderness book).

Oh, look, a butterfly!

Without others around us, we tend to lose focus. We develop poor manners, fleeting thoughts, and laziness. We need pressure in the form of several sets of eyes to actually do things. This is why bloggers burn out so quickly in the early stages: without constant readership to moan when they step out of line, they quickly give in, calling it quits, because there is no reason to go on.

Why don’t you call me a little more often?

It’s no secret: sometimes, we can’t deal with things on our own, and, just like the health aspects to meeting new people, it is necessary at times to have a shoulder to cry on. The only way to find these shoulders is to network.

And the final reason to network?

Hey, um… can I, like, borrow this?

Whether you want to build your business’s clientele, have a co-signer on your loan, bum a cigarette, or otherwise, the only way to accomplish any of these things is to have somebody to help you. You must get out there.

Now, I don’t think I’m at all qualified to preach about the “how” behind marketing, but I most certainly am qualified to talk about the why. After all, I’ve taken a freshman-level college sociology class. That means I know it all about people, right?

…Right?

So, readers, what do you think? Why do you continuously put yourself out there are the risk of failure and rejection?

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How do you guys like it? Let us know in the comments.

Oh, and by the way, if any of y’all know how to avoid the problem with whitespace going over the image in the sidebar upon scrolling, I’m completely out of ideas… Please share.

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What I’m here to talk to you about today, specifically, is StumbleUpon, and the arguments I typically hear for and against it.

StumbleUpon accounts for X% of the traffic my blog receives

You’ll often hear some success stories from people preaching this ubiquitous service, quoting parts of their analytics application, revealing insane traffic spikes. Some people even accomplish upwards of tripling their traffic just by getting a few people to hit the thumbs up.

Unfortunately, what they’ve forgotten to tell you is that traffic from StumbleUpon tends to be that of very fickle people. These are the people who are looking for pretty pictures, list posts, and some form of political argument. If you have a gorgeous, yet politically charged, photo next to the catchiest title in the world, you’ll probably get some decent traffic. Unfortunately, if your blog post is focused on fixing your finances (or web development…) and isn’t in the form of “Best Tools for X,” don’t expect a bounce rate lower than 75% and definitely don’t expect the average time on-site to be higher than 30 seconds.

StumbleUpon is the worst source for conversion rates ever

On the opposite end of the spectrum is the other kind of person obsessed with numbers, just in a negative way. These are the ones who put tracking numbers on every letter they send just to make sure they can obsessively check which marketing material has done its job.

These people are the ones who will complain about anything they don’t feel is worth their time and StumbleUpon is definitely one of the opportunities in their firing lines.

They feel that the two or three new readers from a successful StumbleUpon campaign are not worth the time it took to submit a review. While I can see the point here, and the frustration, any new reader, to me, is worth much more than that.

StumbleUpon… Oh, yeah, I’ve heard of that

This is what you’ll typically hear from bloggers who aren’t concerned with traffic, an audience, making money online, visibility, or even making it through the month. You’ll recognize them by their long, in-depth content with no particular purpose other than to express how they feel.

They don’t know what StumbleUpon is, what it does, or how it works. They just write away until their little hearts’ content and move along at a later date.

Unfortunately, this is the boat Butch and I fall into.

I use that to find cool pictures!

Another kind of blogger who might be considered out-of-the-know, these people might not even be bloggers at all. In fact, they account for the high bounce rates and low time-on-page metrics, because all they want is a pretty picture, a funny joke, or a junk e-mail to pass along. Don’t worry too much about pleasing these people if you have any actual content, because you won’t. Don’t sell out and put up some pictures just for them. Granted, it’s a good idea either way. I just don’t like pictures.

Yeah, I love it! By the way, plz like and review!

Oh, the world of the SU spammer. These are the people who start following you at 3:32 AM. They seem nice enough, but when you add them, suddenly you’re flooded with bizarre pages which have no relevance to your interests whatsoever.

Most spammers find SU very beneficial, as most don’t have the heart to Just Say No. Unfortunately, this won’t change any time soon, so it’s best to just remove them and move along.

While I’m positive I’ve missed many schools of thought on StumbleUpon, I think most people fit into one of the above. Whether they brag or complain about metrics, chances are they are incapable of seeing the other side.

If you find people to be completely clueless as to the advantages (Me, for example), you should enlighten them, as they’ll quickly succumb to the logic and jump on the bandwagon.

If you find people to be spammers, however, ignore them immediately.

No, I will not like and review. Not even if you say, “Please.”

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Day 1 involved building an elevator pitch which I’m going to somehow incorporate into the non-existant about us page on this blog, as I think we came up with a pretty damn good one.

Day 2 is titled “Write a List Post.” My initial thought was “Oh, sweet Jesus, unsubscribe now!”

Forgive me for ranting (yet again), but I have a couple things I need to get off my chest.

Note now that I do not think list posts are inherently bad. I think there are many valid reasons for writing one and the advantages are there. I just think they’re a bit overdone.

Without further ado, these are my 8 reasons to not right a list post.

1. You’re not thinking about it

This is what most people tend to do when they write a list post, using an abused formula: Top + [Number] + [Strong Hyperbole (e.g. Deadly, Super, Totally Retarded)] + What you’re summarizing + (optional) Of [current year].

Examples off the top of my head:

• Top 100 Deadly Social Media Tools of 2007
• 20 Incredibly Stupid Moves a Business Can Make in 2008
• 99 Obvious Reasons Why I Hate List Posts
• etc.

A formula, like a list post, is not inherently a Bad Thing. However, when not thought out, it is a deadly, totally stupid, insane (etc.) thing. Much like pointing a loaded gun on yourself, at one point, you’re going to shoot yourself in the foot.

2. You’re not genuinely helpful

This is what happens to 98% (made it up, but it’s close) of the list posts I read:

1. Scan the title. Still interesting? Move on.
2. Read the bolded parts of the intro. Still have my attention? Move on.
3. Scan the list for software I already know/quotes I’ve already heard/a picture that seems relatively cool compared to the rest of the BS the post is filled with/etc. Probably not interesting anymore, but for the sake of argument:
4. Leave a comment saying, “Yeah, I’ve heard of [GIMP/'Long is the road that out of darkness leads up to light'/Ophelia by John Everett Millais]. Thanks for the great list. Keep ‘em coming.”

Then I hit the stumble button and hope I don’t come across another list post. The point is that I, and most bloggers, are productive people, and like to feel that we’ve not wasted our time on something. If you have a list of provocative quotes that changed the face of the world, then go for it. If you have a list of 10 programs that everybody and his grandmother has heard of, don’t end the title with “You Need To Know About.” Please.

3. You’re alienating your audience

While list posts are an excellent tool for getting a lot of traffic (nobody’s going to argue that), they’re also a great, easy way to completely rid yourself of any subscribers you may have at the time. If you go from genuinely helpful to social media whore overnight, and continue that trend too long or too frequently, you’re going to lose your subscribers. If you have to write a list, include some semblance of value for your regular readers, or you’re going to lose them (if you happen to lose them, feel free to send them our way).

4. I’ve read this before

A reader shouldn’t feel like he or she has read this post a million times elsewhere. Such is the problem with software posts. If we already know about it, stop.

5. I know this already

Similarly, a reader should have to actually think about the content at hand and be learning something new (this is just like the “being useful” problem).

This is definitely the pitfall I’m hitting on this post. You all know this already. But for whatever reason, you’re still doing it! Stop!

6. You’re trying to summarize a complicated problem into “10 Easy Steps You Can Do Today!”

One of the best things about such posts is that they tend to inspire action. It’s one at a time. This is how goals are broken down by millionaires: turn it into a list of next actions that take just a moment to complete. It’s one of the best ways to motivate yourself.

Unfortunately, there are problems not meant to be solved or explained in 10 steps. This is why The Simple Dollar broke down “fixing your finances” into 30 days, each with its own step, explanation, actions, and motivator. It’s a complicated process and it takes time. If you make it 10 easy steps, it’s either going to have to be a very superficial problem or a very superficial fix for a complicated problem. If you must solve a problem, please, provide yourself ample time and opportunity to do so.

7. You’re doing it just to linkwhore

If the only reason you have for writing a post is to generate traffic, and you’re not trying to actually help, provide good content, or inspire people, don’t publish it. Hold on to the post until it actually helps somebody.

8. You’re doing it wrong

This isn’t so much a problem, but rather a summary: If you’re breaking more than one of these rules, writing fluff with the intent to generate traffic while using a formula, then you’re doing it wrong.

So, again, forgive me for complaining, but I fear hitting the stumble button with all the trite content I’m discovering these days. Please, for the love of puppies, stop producing useless content.

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Some important things to remember right now is absorb, assess, and then act. Knowledge without action is impotence. If you do not act, nobody will find you. Keep getting out and doing things.

Avoid the comfort zone. It is not going to save you. There is nothing wrong with paying for a movie for the guy or family behind you and then leaving your business card; your name is out there then. There are lots of things you can do.

Put things into perspective. Things may be tough but it will not go away without persistence. What you do will determine how well you will survive. You have made it this far, keep doing what you were, but step it up and be creative.

Do not fear. That will only cause you grief and lots of stress. This happens and it has happened before.  Don’t negate your own power. Whatever you’ve been dealt, know you can deal with it.

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The most important thing is to get out.  Attend social functions. I am not talking about a bar, but events that places like the Better Business Bureau and Chamber of Commerce put on. This is a great way to get a name for yourself.  You may not get a client right away, but you will meet people, be able to hand out your business cards. Doing that you will have your name out there and next time people need your service they might think about you.

Become an expert. I have said it before, but it needs to be said again. You know your business better than anyone else, so let people know. Do not be afraid to tell people, especially the news media. Make people know that you are the one to turn to when their needs need to be met.

Host an event. There are many things you can do to make this happen. Simple things I have said before, like host a blood drive. You can also get really creative and do something like holding a rally outside your business. It does not have to be for a cause (although that would be better). Just get some people to be in front of your store, maybe holding signs stating what your business is, it can be that simple. Just be creative.

Twitter some. It may not sound like a great thing or even be something you are sure how to do, but learn it. It is a lot like going out to social functions. The more you do it, the more people will notice you. Just another way to get your name out.

There are lots of things you can do, but the important thing to remember is to get out there. If you do not tell people about your business they will never know about you and what you can do for them.

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There are many ways to get your business noticed. Many of them are either free or at a very low cost. The most important thing is that they create a virus. When you get people talking about your business, even if those people do not become clients, some of the people they talk to may become clients. None of these are new. They have been done before, but you can do them and put your own spin on them. So here are a couple cheap ways you can have  fun and make others notice your business.

1. Like this right here, make a list. People love lists. Only your list will be things you can do for people. Make them creative, but be honest. People love to laugh, so make your list fun.

2. Host a blood drive, or an event (like a run/walk) with a non-profit organization. Most local hospitals will set up everything you need for a blood drive. You just provide the people and then you can put up a couple banners with your info on it and, of course, leave your business card where people register. You can also call TV stations and newspapers and they will most likely run/print the information for you. Also, if you do an event, make sure that you are there for the entire thing. You would hate to miss someone wanting to talk about business but is the type of person that is do it now or not at all.

3. Magazines or books at stores or in waiting rooms. While you are waiting to be seen by a doctor or at any other office that makes you wait, as you sift through the magazines, drop a business card in them. Who knows who will pick it up next? If not a new client, maybe that person knows someone that needs your service. At a store you can pick what books you put your card in, like ones that somehow relate to what you do.

4. Random act of kindness. If you are at a movie, amusement park, expo, or any other place that there is usually one price for admission, pay for the person behind you. Just request that the person selling the ticket also give the person behind you your business card.

Again, even if they do not need your service, they will tell their friends about it, who in turn, will probably tell their friends about it.

5. Be an expert… or at least promote yourself as one. An ad agency I once worked for would pitch the owner to TV stations every year right before the Super Bowl, claiming that he was the authority on commercials. That he would sit down with a reporter/producer and rate/explain what advertisers were trying to do with their multi-million dollar ads. Guess what? There was always at least on print and one TV station that would use him. People read or watched and to them, he became an authority on advertising. You too can generate press coverage. Just send reporters/producers a letter or give them a call and introduce yourself, tell them what you do and then tell them you are always available for comment.

6. Magnets/bumper stickers. I prefer magnets on this one, because I am not a big fan of having things stuck to my car, but the downfall is that they do cost a little more. Things on peoples cars, especially bumpers, are seen by lots of people everyday, no matter where you are. This is another item on which you want to be creative. Being funny helps a lot too, because then people stuck in traffic or having a bad day that pull up behind might enjoy it. Then they will tell their friends about it. Like good TV commercials, make it memorable, but make sure people also remember your name.

7. Start a blog/e-article. Start a blog so you can write about your services. Even tell stories that have to do with your business. Again, be create. Then when you feel comfortable, start writing for online newspapers or websites that host articles. You can throw your business name in. Remember, write useful stuff, but enjoyable.

8. Hair salon. These people are big talkers. This is another place you can slip your business card into magazines. But if you really want to get people talking, stop in and get your haircut and offer a great story or two to the people around you and whoever is cutting your hair. You can also offer free products or coupons to the salon.

Yes, all these things have been done before and there are lots more that or about there that are great and will get you noticed. It is your job to think of how to make them unique and original for your business. Attract attention, have fun, but the main thing is to let people do the talking for you. You want to leave them with something to talk about. Whether they need your service or not, make them talk about you and remember you, because chances are, they know someone that does need your service.

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